tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post5678294424602253307..comments2023-06-28T11:26:55.194-04:00Comments on Dancing through NC: Where Do We Go From Here?KT My Ladyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07045966201880044927noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-82424672072734819002010-04-28T16:31:56.717-04:002010-04-28T16:31:56.717-04:00Thank you so much for all of your comments. It'...Thank you so much for all of your comments. It's helpful to hear both positive and negative experiences with such "second chances."<br /><br />I just got back from a much-needed therapy session. I asked C what she thought, and she said, "The only thing that will build trust is time. You will see in time if what he is saying is genuine. In the meantime you need to do what is best for you and take good care of yourself."<br /><br />So, that is where I stand. I am willing to give SCL a chance, some time to show me that he is committed this time. And I am going to continue doing what is best for me. And Katie, if you want to come out to Kostume Karaoke at Solly's Tavern at U Street, let me know. It's Glee-themed. :-)KT My Ladyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07045966201880044927noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-36591252589050291232010-04-28T15:10:55.601-04:002010-04-28T15:10:55.601-04:00Thats why I love this bloggie community, its like ...Thats why I love this bloggie community, its like getting an unbiased opinion. Nothing wrong with giving it another go, you seem to have the right ideas. Good luck with it!Laurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02181230882381286160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-37528769406950261722010-04-28T14:44:50.822-04:002010-04-28T14:44:50.822-04:00All I can say is do what is right for you and your...All I can say is do what is right for you and your heart. Instead of putting him first, make him put your relationship first. My husband threw out an interesting statement that I thought I would share with you, "A guy knows when he loves someone and wants to spend their life with them. They know within a matter of dates. If he's making you wait, then you're going to continue to wait because he knows that you'll do that for him. It's a test and a game, which can only be one winner and one loser. Be confident and put yourself first and if he doesn't follow, then you're wasting your time and he's sucking it up."Ashleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04407989777350912262noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-70894233625179005562010-04-28T14:03:35.221-04:002010-04-28T14:03:35.221-04:00Someone once told me, "know that you are neve...Someone once told me, "know that you are never standing on the edge of a cliff." Life changes and we change with it. Take your time and do what is right for you when it is right for you.Tina L. Hookhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12780807680745838371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-70322921296597415962010-04-28T13:47:10.597-04:002010-04-28T13:47:10.597-04:00No judgment. I know all about that, because my ex...No judgment. I know all about that, because my ex and I kept going back and forth and my friends were all upset that he'd never commit to me. What they didn't understand was that I'm actually not the live together/marriage/babies type, so I was 90% ok with it. The only part that freaked me out was the possibility of him dating other people.<br /><br />Anyway, I wish only good things for you.<br /><br />-ATAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-19754270200822640252010-04-28T13:29:15.233-04:002010-04-28T13:29:15.233-04:00No judgment at all, but this post opens up old wou...No judgment at all, but this post opens up old wounds for me. My ex did the exact same thing after we broke up. And he'd had "an obsession" too. Just be careful. At least you guys haven't moved out yet. The first thing that has to go is this other girl. No contact, no relationship, nothing. If he's going to commit to you, he needs to COMMIT TO YOU. Other chick has to go. And I second the idea of couples therapy.<br /><br />Also -- don't stop doing things that make you happy. Make time for yourself. Give yourself space. Enjoy life.Capital Katiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16647853470297792361noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-9501379837521732392010-04-28T12:06:57.289-04:002010-04-28T12:06:57.289-04:00I agree - no judgement, just faith that the way th...I agree - no judgement, just faith that the way things are meant to be, they will. Like Cee said there is a quote "The only two people allowed to judge a relationship are the two in it."<br />And that song says it all. I often listen to it when Bear and I have fights. As a society we grow up falsely believing in ideals and happy ever afters. Life and relationships are so much more entangled and indescribable.<br /><br />Hug!livin widehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18177641806080406988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-38848855156299737412010-04-28T10:43:30.499-04:002010-04-28T10:43:30.499-04:00I had the feeling that this would happen as I'...I had the feeling that this would happen as I've followed your story. I agree with both of the comments above- I, too, had an on and off ex who I kept returning to (and often think about returning to again). No matter what others have told me, my moments with him were the best moments of my life. If both you and SCL WANT it to work then I believe it definitely can. Therapy is key and it sounds like you two are being very cautious, which is good. Be careful and be happy!Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06963106436363608801noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-66597275719136575252010-04-28T10:20:08.471-04:002010-04-28T10:20:08.471-04:00No judgment here girl. I totally believe in second...No judgment here girl. I totally believe in second chances, and sometimes more, if it is for the right person. I know first hand that people can change for the better and breaking up can improve your relationship in the long term. I don't want to leave a super long comment with my life story but just know I have been there. My best advice is to go slow and go with your gut, you are going to get shit from people...like friends and family...who think you are making a mistake. They are trying to look out for you, but ultimately it has to come down to you and him. No one can ever truly understand what goes on between two people in a relationship except for those two people.courtneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00368060921177803100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354936394077279437.post-76129018096775217962010-04-28T10:17:04.678-04:002010-04-28T10:17:04.678-04:00I compare this relationship a lot to the one I had...I compare this relationship a lot to the one I had with my most recent ex. And because of that, I am the last person to say, "You're making a big mistake." Because he and I were on and off for years. And no matter what anyone told me, even my very best friends, I did what a wanted. <br /><br />That said, my advice to you is that if you two do get back together, go to therapy together. I think that will help the both of you decide what it is you want out of the relationship, how to not make the same mistakes again and if you really should stay together.<br /><br />In the end, you're going to make the decisions that your heart and head want you to make. Just be sure to listen to BOTH of them. And be careful, okay?Krysten @ Why Girls Are Weirdhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07290616156300143483noreply@blogger.com