New City, New Job

I have survived the first week at the new job, which fortunately for me was a short week. Things weren't quite as smooth as I'd hoped. First, my commute is a little ridiculous at the moment since I'm staying way out in the suburbs with my aunt. Getting to work requires a car, a bus, and the subway, but I'm getting the hang of it and looking forward to a shorter commute once SCL and I find an apartment (more on that later). Second, my supervisor returned from a trip out of the country and brought back a nasty stomach virus, so I have not even spoken to her at all. My hope is that she'll be back in the office on Monday and I can finally figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing. But, I love my office and my colleagues! Last night they invited me to happy hour after work and filled me in on all the office gossip, which I hope means I'm now "in" with them.

Apartment hunting. Honestly, I can't tell you much about it because SCL has been doing ALL of the work: the calling, the online research, the google mapping, the review reading. I've been so overwhelmed with starting my new job, which is not as much of a 9-5 job as my last one was, that I really have not had time to do any of this even though I'm the one currently in DC. SCL has set up four appointments for us this weekend and early next week, all places that we can afford and are within walking distance of the Metro. He's really stepped up and done all this hard work himself, and all I can say is thank you and tell him how much I appreciate him.

This move has made me realize how difficult it is for me to let other people help me out, even people really close to me. I'm used to doing, doing, doing all the time for other people (and sometimes playing the martyr because of it--thanks Mom!), and it's hard for me to admit that I need help doing something. I had to leave my previous apartment a solid month before the lease ended, knowing that my roommate would have to do all of the cleaning and dealing with odds and ends that we'd shared. I finally just had to let it go. I also left everything that wouldn't fit in my car for SCL to load up in the U-Haul and drive down.

One of SCL's strengths is showing me he cares through helping me out and doing things for me, oftentimes things I'm certainly capable of doing but would be hardships without his help. And I'm learning to let him do that, accepting that he does it because he loves me. I know that in a few months when he begins his PhD, things are going to be stressful for him, and I just hope that I can be there for him in the ways that he's been there for me during my transition.

I can honestly say now that he's not just my boyfriend. He is my partner.