I spent my last night in DC trudging through a torrential downpour to my going away party, which was awesome, only to return to two inches of water on the floor of my bedroom closet. Thank God Carolina Man and I had already packed all my stuff up into the cars--just a few hours before the rain fell I'd had all my linens, clothes, and books packed on the floor of the closet. I took it as a final "F*** you" from DC.
But no, the water on the floor was in fact the penultimate DC middle finger. The last would be the extra hour and a half it took for us to get from DC to Richmond. There's nothing worse than desperately wanting to get somewhere and have all the traffic gods crap on you. But eventually, we got here, unpacked the cars, and passed out from exhaustion.
The last few days have been awesome and exhilarating, weird and strange, relaxed and comfortable, stressful and tense. It's been the roller-coaster of feelings and emotions that we anticipated it would be, and we've just done our best to talk through it all. As we were falling asleep last night, I asked CM, "Do you think we have more issues than most couples do?" He said, "I think we have as many issues as any other couples. The difference is that we aren't afraid to name them when they come up."
In so many ways, CM and I are still getting to know each other. We have similar issues and insecurities, but the situations that trigger them are so unique to each of us. In time, we'll learn more about those and will have a better understanding of why the other reacts a certain way. I love that we can talk openly about our hurts and pain from the past.
It's easy for me in some ways to feel like CM has always been in my life. I have nearly forgotten what it was like to spend every night alone and to have no one to snuggle up next to in the morning. I have to remind myself of how much has changed in such a short period of time. More time than I could have anticipated, it just feels normal. Being with CM feels like home.
All I have to say is this: =-)
ReplyDeleteYou hit it on the head: the thing I want to find with someone is a sense of home. That's how you know it's right. All else is details.
ReplyDeleteWhat you aren't sharing with your readers is the highly comical (in retrospect) walk to the bar for your going away party. You with your Hello Kitty mini-umbrella dripping rainwater down your dress, me with my jeans wet up to my knees. I'll never forget you turning around every block or so to yell various things at me through the downpour like: "I can't f***ing believe this, I'm completely soaked" amd "This is ridiculous, I wouldn't even show up if it weren't my going away party". While it wasn't funny in the moment, I can't help but chuckle to re-live that walk.
ReplyDeleteIt was interesting to witness DC giving us a major flipping-off on our way out of town juxtaposed with the warmth of your friends at the going away party. I'm sad to have you leaving your DC home and sad that I can't have more time to get to know your friends there, but I'm so happy to have you in this house. I'm so happy to wake up next to you and spend my evenings with you. And maybe in between business trips and family visits I can be happy to spend a weekend with you in this house one day. I agree with you, this house feels like our home and you've only been here 4 days. That feeling will only strengthen as time passes and we become more and more comfortable with the newness. I'm so happy you're finally here baby.
I hope things are settling well. Home is a wonderful feeling and everyone deserves to find theirs. :)
ReplyDeleteLor