You've Got a Lot of Nerve

So it seems that my job is getting in the way of my blogging. I hate when that happens! I'm off to New York for the week, but before I go, I just had to write about this.

Yesterday I was having a good day. A fantastic day, actually. After a few really rough days of work, I had gotten an invitation to meet with some of the House Foreign Affairs staff. It had gone really well, and I was feeling like maybe I actually have a chance to, I don't know, impact something for real for once. On my walk back to the Metro, I was talking with my colleague when I decided to quickly check my email on my phone.

"What the fuck? Are you fucking kidding me with this shit?" All my lady-likeness and politeness I'd managed to muster up for my Hill meeting had dissipated instantly. Because at the top of my email was this.

"Dr. Nutrition would like to add you to his professional network on LinkedIn."

WHAT. THE. FUCK?!?!?!

Let me refresh your memory. Dr. N and I went out for about two months when he decided just to completely blow me off, even after I'd given him an easy out. It hurt my feelings, pissed me off, but it wasn't the end of the world. Whatever, guys can be dicks about that shit. But then after that, he has the balls to send me a LinkedIn invitation out of nowhere?

Not to hate on LinkedIn, but requests to be added to someone's network are even less personal and more generic than a Facebook friend request. Usually it's something I reserve for people with whom I've worked and with whom I am on good terms. To be clear, Dr. Nutrition and I are not on good terms because he blew me off and hasn't talked to me for 4 months. 


So, I respond to his out-of-the-blue request with a one word e-mail. "Seriously?"

I didn't expect him to respond. But within an hour, I got this reply:

"Hi, how have you been? I'm sorry for how things ended between us, but I'd like to maintain a professional relationship...if possible. Since we talked, I became chair of this new organization. I've attached some information and I'd love for you to join. Look it over and let me know if you want to be a member. Have a great weekend! Dr. Nutrition."

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS BULLSHIT? You blow me off, you don't talk to me for MONTHS, and now you want me to do you a fucking favor? You want me to JOIN your organization?!

There were so many things I wanted to say in response. But, I restrained myself. I simply said, "Best of luck. Sorry, I don't have time for any more commitments. If you want to expand your membership, I recommend contacting this and that person. Best, Me." 

Look, Dr. Nutrition. DC is a small fucking town, and you burned a bridge with me--a bridge to fantastic. Had you been decent enough to tell me that things weren't working out, it would've taken me some time, but we could definitely be cordial with one another. But since you didn't have the balls to be honest, I don't owe you a fucking thing.

16 comments:

  1. OMFG, seriously I'm having de ja vu with this. I worte about a similar a-hole who was horrible to me and then linked in me not once, but twice. I wrote about it last November and I swear I know that EXACT feeling. Good for you for telling him to go away. Sigh, maybe it's a DC thing?

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  2. Ugh! What the hell are they thinking? It's one thing to not want to date me. It's another to be a dick about it. Had it just been the former, I'd be happy to stay in touch, but seriously, writing me when you need something? Beyond audacious in my mind.

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  3. Why did you stop dating? Are you seeing your ex on the side?

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  4. Juilie, why am I not dating? http://thenonstudent.blogspot.com/2010/11/freedom-of-not-dating.html.

    And no, I'm not. How would it be "on the side" unless I were dating someone else anyway?

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  5. You go girl!! Geez some men!! What the heck!

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  6. Ewww...I have been out of blogland so I don't know all the background but just from that he seems like a real creep. Good for you for restraining yourself! I don't think I would have been able to!

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  7. ::fistpump::! Perfect response, both of your emails to him. I bet it smarted.

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  8. Yeah, that was such a DC thing to do on his part. What a piece of shit.

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  9. Guys can be so thick. This is such a perfect example of how they deal with issues compared to girls. Time passes and suddenly its like it never happened. I would venture to guess that had you just accepted his invite he would have never brought up what happened or would have at least avoided it as long as humanly possible. Unless joining his little network has some seriously awesome benefits to you professionally (which would be the only reason I'd ever even consider accepting something like that from someone like him)...just ignore.

    Now where will you be in NYC?? Are you here for work? We should do HH!

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  10. absolutely not a damn thing...

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  11. Basically ditto to what everyone else has said. It was a total jerk move and you handled it way, way, way better than I think I would've. Dude definitely deserved way more than a "seriously."

    Lor

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  12. Just shows you how clueless and self centered this guy is. He doesn't give a flip about anyone but himself. No sensitivity, no integrity, no idea of how that might piss a woman off and make a normal person NEVER want to hear from him again.
    Because he's all about ME, ME, ME! You are glad to be rid of someone so selfish, self absorbed and so unaware. Not attractive qualities for any relationship....short or long term!

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  13. I get those invites all the time. So annoying. Someone imports their address book and clicks send and suddenly everyone in their contacts list gets one of those invites. I'll bet he got a few terse responses like yours.

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