You may remember from the first breakup that I joined OkCupid on a whim, mostly for my own ego boost. I talked with a few people, but never went out on any dates. Then SCL and I were back together and so on and so on...
But, I never closed my account. Maybe that was my gut saying "Keep your eyes open, sweetie." Back in April, I got a message that said, "I love Georgia. What part are you from?" I have a tender spot for those who appreciate my home state, so we chatted back and forth, nothing serious. But, then once I found myself suddenly single (and indicated as such on my profile), he asked if I wanted to meet, and we set up a time for after my vacation.
We met in Dupont. First impressions: tall, buff, handsome, same eye color as me (dark hazel), and a great smile. He'd told me he had a "place in mind" to go, but then he just gave a vague "let's sit outside." So we ended up at Le Pain Quotidien, which just happened to be the first place we saw with outdoor seating. And my roommate works there. Not exactly an ideal place for just having a drink, but it was fine. We had a very sweet waiter who was patient with us, even though Dr. Nutrition didn't even glance at his menu for at least thirty minutes.
Dr. Nutrition got his PhD in his mid-20s and now works for the National Institutes of Health. He's super fit (runs marathons, does triathlons, is a big yoga buff, etc.) and super positive. He has a very personal trainer-type personality. I could see why he does what he does--he could encourage anyone with his bright eyes and positive energy.
He did talk a lot--not really about himself and not in an egotistical way, but he's definitely a storyteller. I could tell he's had a ton of amazing experiences and is always seeking new opportunities to learn and grow. He was very interesting, but I kept wondering, "When is he going to realize that I haven't shared really anything about myself?" I sipped my one glass of wine which gave me a slight buzz, so I decided against a second glass.
Honestly, I couldn't tell how he was feeling about me at all. Was this just a friend thing? Or a date thing? I ended up paying for my drink, which gave me a "friend thing" vibe. Damn.
We walked toward the Metro, and I was fully prepared just to head home. But then he said, "I'm hungry. Do you want to get some dinner?" Sure, why not? It was 9:30 at that point, and I was pretty famished. We headed to Maoz Vegetarian for the most delicious falafel I've had in a long time. He cracked me up though--he had a folder of his LivingSocial vouchers, with a top sheet listing them all by expiration date. Type-A, much?
As we ate our delicious falafel outside, things got a lot better conversation-wise. I told him about my family and my work, how I hope to travel to the Middle East and Africa next summer through work. He seemed genuinely interested in me and even joked about how he'd talked so much--and that he usually doesn't do that. "Sure, that's what you tell everyone," I said. I felt like I could tease him a bit about his neurosis and his overachieving personality. I'm used to that--I went to Yale.
But, there is something annoying about being around someone who has done and experienced so much that I felt like I had nothing new to add. There weren't many experiences I shared that he hadn't had his hand in at some point. I think he's just a really passionate person and has a lot of interests, but I ended up feeling kind of unspecial, I guess? I don't think of myself as boring at all, but he was sort of overwhelming in all of his interests, passions, and experiences. I sort of felt like I hadn't done much in comparison. Probably this is just my own insecurity that I need to get over.
So, all in all it was a decent date. It actually was pretty fun--talked for almost five hours. We parted at the Metro with a hug (no kiss) and I told him I'd had fun. I'm not sure if I have strong feelings either way about having a second date, so we'll see how it goes. But most of all, I'm just proud of myself for putting myself out there. And it's good to know there are some really nice, quality guys out there. Well, at least one.
Yay! Definitely doesn't sound half bad. And definitely better than some of the horror stories I've heard. I'm proud of you!
ReplyDeleteYay! It sounds like a nice night. I'm going to have to do some of this too eventually.
ReplyDeleteGood for you! Text him and tell him you had fun. If he asks you out again, go out again. Trust me, they only get worse from here.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I really don't roll with the whole online/forced dating scene. I think things happen as they're supposed to, and when you're ready to meet someone special, you will. Nonetheless, it's good you're getting out there and meeting people. Although I'm sure this guy was interesting, I think the fact that he focused primarily on himself should be a bit of a red flag. That and the whole anal retentive (think coupons), health nut thing. I dated one of those once. Cool at first....annoying down the line. Doesn't sound like a Love Connection for you, but nice that you got out.
ReplyDeleteOh, and the buying of your own wine? I don't care...friend or not...he's the one that extended the invitation, honestly he should have paid for it. Or at least offered. I don't know....just not feeling this one for ya.
This is anonymous commenter AT. I won't be posting anonymously anymore because you've inspired me to create my own blog! So thanks for that! Also I wanted you to know that I'm not one of the hater anonymous people. I am rooting for you and I hope I didn't inadvertently offend you. If I did, I apologize.
ReplyDeleteI'm happy for you that your date wasn't a disaster! Dating can be fun and you can discover a lot about yourself. There are many nice guys out there!
you go girl, just keep yourself busy and keep on just dating :)
ReplyDeleteWell, I got asked out on a second date. So far so good! More on the blog later.
ReplyDeleteyay! It sounds lke a great start! I can't wait to hear about the second date :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so proud you're putting yourself out there!! That's one of the best things you can do for yourself right now!
ReplyDelete